Loss and grief

Losing a parent

The death of a parent. Including complicated grief when the relationship was difficult, abusive, or estranged. Including the grief of losing a parent you never really had, or of losing one before you got to resolve things between you.

The death of a parent rearranges something structural, whatever the relationship was. When it was loving, the loss is enormous. When it was complicated or harmful, the grief gets tangled with anger, relief, and the final closing of a door you may have hoped would someday open. Every version of that is grief, and every version is welcome.

What can follow an experience like this

No two people carry the same experience the same way. These are some of the effects that people with this experience often describe. Having some of them, all of them, or none of them says nothing about how real what happened to you was.

Depression Not just sadness. Recent grief Not all grief is stuck or complicated. Anxious attachment Holding on hard. Insomnia Difficulty falling asleep. Anxiety The background hum of dread that is always there. Identity disturbance Not being able to answer simple questions about yourself. Codependency The person who holds everyone else together while quietly falling apart. Prolonged grief Grief that did not follow the expected path.

Nothing on this page is a diagnosis, and nothing here decides what is wrong with you, because nothing is wrong with you. Something happened to you. This page exists so that when you are ready, you can find people who understand it from the inside.

You do not have to carry this alone.

Bridge of Hope Recovery is a free, anonymous, peer-led fellowship for trauma survivors. Meetings run throughout the week by phone, by video, and in person. No cost, no waitlist, no one asking for your real name.

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